Ever get that feeling where you are not sure what the f*ck is happening around you.. Things don't go the way you expect it to be, yet you hope there will be change that will bring back that fucking smile back on your face.. but there is a catch, the catch is you have to make a choice.. A choice so difficult to make... so difficult to choose.. It’s like a guy who is holding a red pill in his one hand and blue in the other.. You know you want to take the red pill since it will lead you to the end of the road, but you are shit scared. You don't know what to do. You try to get help... try to get some guidance so you can put up with this misery. All the pain and sacrifice you make, you want people to see it and yet you don't want to reveal it, you wrap it so tight but people look at you and say 'What the fuck is wrong with you?', then you start projecting these emotions.. These feelings that you are no longer enjoying this so called fucking thing called Life. You don't want to sound desperate; you don't want people to think you are a psychopath; you just put on the mask which reads 'I’m OK' ... But you are not... It is simply a matter of your thought.. You think hard, you fall to the ground. You feel beaten, you smell the blood... you can smell the dirt, the filth like you would call it... and still you don't fucking realize the concept of reality and all you need to do is just get on with it... You try, and try.. Over and over again but nothing is working out. It's almost as if your brain has stopped responding to you. It is only taking the questions and not giving you the answers. You dig harder and deeper, hoping there will be the answer which will free you from this prison of thoughts. In the end, you come to know "YOU ARE JUST FUCKED UP". You realize you want to pull the plug off your socket, you think a million times of how beautiful your life was… how those moments made you treasure that you stored it in your memories so no one can possibly erase it. But you look at it with shock, disbelief, and a bit of disgust and wonder what the fuck made it change. You curse everyone, you start behaving rudely. You start telling yourself “WHY THE FUCK SHOULD I CARE?” All of this because of one simple thing called “Thought”. Your thought didn’t do any good … it only did BAD. You accepted it and it overcame you. It conquered your mind, locked your heart and made it difficult to breathe. Sometimes, you need to “Let Go” off certain things that you can never get. You keep moving on, don’t hold anything back… It’s such a small term yet makes a large difference.
